Forgive me if now until the 7th of April I don't post as much as you'd like me to. I will be busy working the malls Easter set on top of working my normal 33 hour week. Can you say 45+ hour work week? That's more then I've ever worked in my life. Did I mention that between all that, I plan on finding time for the gym as much as possible. Wow I'm going to be one busy lady! I think I'm on the edge of losing my cashiering job. Yikes right!? Today was the third time that I've gotten written up for my register being short. I don't know how that keeps happening. I'm always very careful when it comes to handling cash. On top of being short, my managers have made me perfectly aware that they think I'm the slacker of the group. I'm an amazing cashier, don't get me wrong. (if cashiers could be considered amazing, that's me!) But I suck at being a salesman. I suck at convincing people to upgrade to our "Plus membership". I try, I really truly do. No I haven't always tried, but lately I have been and I keep on getting rejected. Sales or not, do you know how ego crushing that is to get rejected? Oh well. I'm kind of thinking that this is a sign that maybe my time at this job is coming to an end. Maybe I should get off my butt and finally be something! I'd like to see myself staying with a company for a few years. I'd like to see myself being around my coworkers for a long time. Strengthen friendships and building long term bonds. But maybe this job isn't for me. I'm not going to quit until I have something lined up. But who knows if I'm going to be fired. But truthfully, I'm not too worried if I am. The stress from the management is unbearable and sometimes I'd like to see things getting better there, but it doesn't. You sell three upgrades one day out of luck, you're royalty. The next day, you're nothing. The slacker of the group. The one getting yelled at. The one that feels like just screaming and saying ''forget every one of you'', when all you are is the nice girl. This gentleman who works in produce told me how I'm too sweet to be a cashier in that store. How they get treated awful. It's funny how he's never cashiered there, yet he knows. I don't mean to get all Anne Frank on you guys, but I just felt like talking tonight. We all need to vent once in a while. To conclude this as of right now I'm not sure what is going to happen, I'm kind of living daily. But I can either look for another job here, look for another job in a city and move start fresh somewhere new, alone. Or I could go stay with my dad in NY for a while or I could just leave things the way they are. The first three options sound a lot better though. I wish I had the guts to leave though. I do, just will have to push myself. I just have to fill myself with ambition and optimism. Things will be okay. Bless your heart if you read this all.